another sex tutorial



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Masturbation

Masturbation is a natural and healthy method of sexual release engaged in by most people of both sexes. It is also a good way of learning one's own sexual response. Women who can bring themselves to orgasm by masturbating are more likely to have orgasms with their partners, and men who can masturbate for 15-20 minutes without ejaculating are less likely to suffer from problems of premature ejaculation during intercourse. Stimulating your partner's genitals is also called masturbation, and is an important part of lovemaking.

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The external female genitals are called the vulva. Pubic hair grows on the labia major, and inside these outer vaginal lips are the labia minor, which are pinker and moister. If the sight of your own genitals is not familiar to you, examine them in a hand mirror while you relax after a bath or shower. The clitoris is situated where the labia minor join at the top. It is a pink knob about the size of a dried pea, and is highly sensitive. The clitoris is protected by a hood, which retracts during sexual arousal. Below the clitoris is the tiny opening of the urethra, through which urine passes, and below that is the opening to the vagina.

When you start to masturbate, make sure you have plenty of time during which you won't be interrupted. Go somewhere where it is quiet, completely private, and warm. Some women like to lie on their back, some on their front; some like their legs pressed tightly together, others like them spread wide apart, or propped up above the body. Use a lubricant and stroke yourself gently, with your fingers or an object such as a vibrator, varying your movements from time to time to find out where and how you like to be stimulated.

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Many women find the clitoris too sensitive for direct stimulation, so you could begin by rubbing the whole vulva, then gradually move inside with delicate fingers. Allow yourself to fantasize to increase arousal. Be patient, but if the pleasure wears off without you having had an orgasm then you should stop. Don't be disappointed with yourself, as it may take several sessions before you can relax enough to really let go.

When you feel a gathering tension in the vaginal area and a build-up of warmth, orgasm is on the way. Continue to stimulate yourself, as if you stop, these sensations will fade and it may be difficult to get them back again. The clitoris becomes increasingly sensitive as you proceed, whether you are stimulating it directly or not, and then orgasm breaks out with waves of vaginal contractions. Most women like some form of genital contact during orgasm: either continued stimulation or pressing or holding the vaginal area. Some like to insert a finger into the vagina as they come.

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 Most men are expert at giving themselves pleasure, but there's no harm in extra practice. A good way of finding out exactly how your genitals respond to stimulation is by soaping and gentle massage in the bath, allowing yourself to fantasize as you do so. Some men enjoy fondling their testicles, and some enjoy penetrating the anus with a finger. There are many different strokes you can use on the penis. If you are uncircumcised, you can draw the foreskin over the head of the penis and then pull it back down the shaft to get an erection; if you are circumcised, repeated squeezing round the shaft and letting go is usually effective. Then you can let your hand glide up and down the shaft in long slow movements, gradually building up speed and pressure. You may enjoy rubbing or tickling the glans of the penis, though for some men this is too sensitive. You may like gentle or firm pulling, stroking, squeezing and stretching. Try holding off ejaculation by varying the stroke when you become too excited, before finally letting go in orgasm.

Masturbation need not be something that you do only when you are alone. Many people find the sight of their partner masturbating highly erotic. It can also be very instructive to discover how your partner reaches orgasm alone, as this will be the best method for you to adopt when you are masturbating him or her. Masturbating with your partner will break down inhibitions and allow you to get even closer.

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Masturbating your partner in the way he or she enjoys is an important part of lovemaking, and many women like being masturbated to orgasm before penetration. Both men and women need to learn how to handle each other's genitals with tenderness and sensitivity.

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